Thursday, August 31, 2000 Older Editions

Dealing with death: Community reacts to beach tragedy

By Rebecca Piro

One week after a rare beach accident claimed the life of young Ivan Smith, members of the Andover community are still struggling to come to grips with the freak accident.

Guidance counselors this week have been available to students at Doherty Middle School, the school Ivan attended, even though the school will not open until Sept. 7.

The Trauma Intervention Program has also coordinated an informational meeting involving the Salisbury police, the family, and friends of Ivan who were involved in the tragedy.

Ivan died last Tuesday, Aug. 22 at Salisbury Beach when a hole he and three friends had dug in the sand suddenly collapsed on him.

Family, friends, schoolmates and neighbors of Ivan Smith ascended the steps of St. Augustine Church on Essex Street Saturday afternoon to say a last farewell to the 13-year-old boy.

"When it's a child (who dies), it's different," said town offices receptionist Mary Spignesi, the day of Ivan's funeral Mass. "I've seen so many men who have been so emotional."

The Rev. Alfred Ellis offered words of comfort to the congregation, while admitting it is difficult not to question why such a young person's life would be ended so abruptly.

"No matter how short a life is, we measure it by quality, not quantity," Ellis said.

Ivan was a playful, patient boy who was good to his elders and loved animals, he recalled. Ivan was always active with baseball and biking, and stood firmly for things he believed in, despite his youth.

"He had the ability to transcend and stand up against playground prejudices," Ellis noted.

A memorial bike trip will be held in his honor Saturday, Sept. 2.

Last Saturday's ceremony followed a Friday evening wake at Dewhirst & Conte funeral home, where Ivan's bicycle, his baseball glove and his snowboard had stood inside the room as reminders of the young boy, said Spignesi. The line of people waiting to pay their respects was out the door for much of the evening.

The same show of support filled almost every pew of St. Augustine Saturday afternoon. People who were close with Ivan and his family attended, as well as town employees who worked with Ivan's father, Rod Smith, an accountant for the town, and people whose hearts simply went out to the family.

"We're like an extended family," added Spignesi.

A Salisbury police officer represented the rescue crews that spent over 90 minutes trying to save Ivan last Tuesday.

Though Ivan's life was ended at such a young age, higher powers had something else in mind for the boy, Ellis said.

"Ivan points the way for us, and gives us an opportunity to reflect on who we are," he said. "Ivan may be looking down on us right now and saying, 'Don't worry about me. How are you doing?' "

Ivan's mother and father, who stood at the front of the church with Ivan's disabled older brother, Nicholas, have stood up to the test of the past week amazingly, said Kathy McCue, a former town employee who worked with Rod Smith. "Nancy and Rod have been remarkably strong through this," she said, considering the shock of the sudden loss of their son. "(Ron and I) were laughing and joking together only days ago. You just don't know."

A private burial was held at Spring Grove Cemetery immediately following the funeral.

Though Doherty Middle School does not officially open until next Thursday, Andrew Rosenshine, the school's adjustment counselor, said he is willing to speak with children having a difficult time with their classmate's passing.

"If parents are recognizing that their children are having a really hard time, I would encourage people to give me a call," he said.

In the meantime, Rosenshine has been making his own phone calls to children he knows were close to Ivan. And support will continue when school starts, he added.

"We're going to talk about the issue as school begins," he said, especially within the eighth-grade classrooms that Ivan would have entered this fall.